Barry K. Weinhold, Ph.D.
Directions: Place the number that represents your best response in the blank before the number of each statement. Use the following scale to determine your answers:(1= Almost Never, 2= Sometimes, 3= Often, 4= Almost Always).
__1. Conflicts just seem to happen to me and I have no idea why.
__2. In a conflict situation, someone has to win and someone has to lose.
__3. In a conflict situation, I feel victimized by the actions of others.
__4. I can see the underlying patterns in my recurring conflicts.
__5. I have the skills to help others successfully resolve their conflicts. __6. If I have a conflict, I turn it over to God.
__7. In a conflict situation, I tend to see myself as right and the other person as wrong.
__8. In a conflict situation, I try to “shoot down” the arguments of the other person.
__9. As the result of resolving my conflicts I am able to better understand myself and why I got into a conflict with this person.
__10. I have altered some of my values and beliefs as the result of my conflicts.
__11. I wish that the people who bug me would just go away.
__12. In a conflict situation, I end up not getting what I want and the other person does.
__13. I lack confidence in my ability to resolve my conflicts successfully.
__14. I can see the causes of my current conflicts stemming from similar unresolved conflicts as a child.
__15. I have the ability to locate and resolve any unresolved conflicts from my past.
__16. In a conflict situation, I get afraid that I’ll lose myself if I consider the other person’s position or needs.
__17. I believe that the past is the past, you have to put it behind you and go on.
__18. I depend on the instruction of my teachers because they have more knowledge and experience than I do.
__19. I am able to see how the patterns of unresolved conflicts from my past are controlling my life.
__20. I am able to change the major underlying dysfunctional patterns of behavior that have controlled my life.
Scoring: To get a score for each of the five stages of consciousness, add the numbers for the four items keyed to each stage;
Stage One (Add items 1, 6, 11, and 16) = ___
Stage Two (Add items 2, 7, 12, and 17) = ___
Stage Three (Add items 3, 8, 13, and 18) = ___
Stage Four (Add items 4, 9, 14, and 19) = ___
Stage Five (Add items 5, 10, 15, and 20) = ___
Interpretation: The stages of consciousness where you had your highest scores are the ones that you are most likely to use in a conflict situation. The higher the stage of consciousness where you have your high scores, the better chance you have of being successful in using the Partnership Way to resolve your conflicts.
In each of the five stages or consciousness,
10 -16 = a high score, 5 – 9 = a medium score, and 1 – 4= a low score.